Withdrawal from the Exhibition “POTOK” at Galeria Plama / Gdański Archipelag Kultury

With regret, I inform you that, due to personal reasons, I am withdrawing from the exhibition “POTOK,” organized at Galeria Plama as part of the Gdański Archipelag Kultury. This was a difficult decision, but the current circumstances prevent me from continuing the realization of my installation, which is based on the flow of energy.

I sincerely thank the organizers for their support and collaboration. I hope that in the future I will be able to present my work under conditions that fully reflect its idea and artistic vision.

I also thank you – my audience – for your understanding and support.

Flashback 1.0

Let me tell you a short story. Life feels like a Truman Show, and in this movie I play the role of the true man. Banksy is my guardian angel—the only character in the show who isn’t scripted. He simply appears, sometimes even inside my mind. I chose him to guide me, and only now am I beginning to understand that choice again. This vision was first shown to me in 2019 in London, and now I find myself returning to the same realization: we cannot meet unless I step outside the set. And the only place in the world where there are no cameras… That’s where we’ll meet, since all cameras are on me 24/7

Lesson 2.0

Diabel and Two Diabelas

Thinking back to my trip to Budapest after Tyhani Art Camp with Diabel, I would like to recall lessons learned and the time I was in a situation with Diabel and he truly was the incarnation of a Devil. He is a trickey little bugger and did nothing wrong—everything was according to our agreement. The deal was that when at Art Camps together we are together, and when out we are free to do whatever we want with whomever.

Technically Avril and Marley were fare game, and silly me, I was the one that planted the idea we all could have some fun together just to see his reaction—and he was all for it. Even during our making love session he asked if we could invite the other two to join in, since I had mentioned that maybe we could. I told him I was just teasing and did not mean it… he said ok. He was very disappointed, and on the last day of our stay at the hotel, as I was packing, he had a threesom.

I only realized afterward what had happened. He went to get breakfast but was gone for an hour, and when he returned he brought back the same thing he had the day before from the same store, along with a story about meeting a friend. The synchronicity revealed itself when Avril came into the kitchen in sexy pj’s, with this look in her eyes as if she wanted to say goodbye to Diabel.

After a while Avril’s image kept haunting me, and I was wondering what she wanted, but now I know—she felt guilty. We had a wonderful evening together the night Diabel met up with Kata, and I was so disappointed that he left me alone on my first night in Budapest. I told Avril and Marley all about it. We actually bonded.

That night was also when I first opened the windows of our hotel room and saw the two devil sculptures on the building across the street. Later, that same night, I met Avril and Marley for the first time, while Diabel was off with Kata. Only today do I realize the synchronicity—the two devils on the building, and the two lovers. It all just clicked.

Lesson learned: when synchronicities and warning signs appear, they are not random—they are messages. I saw the two devils on the building and felt the strange energy, but I chose to ignore it. I brushed away the discomfort and convinced myself everything was fine, even though deep down I knew otherwise. The truth is, when I don’t listen to the signs, I end up hurt and disappointed. The universe was whispering, and I silenced it. Now I know better.

Lesson 1.0

Lessons Learned from My Situationship with Diabel – Part 1: The First Synchronicity

I promised myself I would share the lessons learned from my situationship with Diabel in Tyhani. At first, I thought I’d record the stories, but as I started writing them down, I realized this format suits me better. When I write, I remember more details—things I hadn’t noticed or didn’t want to acknowledge while I was in the middle of it all.

Looking back, I can see how my guardian angel was trying to spare me heartache. I could have avoided so many tears, yet I also know that some of the emotions I felt with Diabel were frozen emotions from my past—things I’ve carried since my first relationships, starting when I was about 11 or 12 years old.

I’ve had many boyfriends over the years. I was always considered a pretty girl, the one many boys liked, but I was often too shy to be with most of them. At the same time, I’d develop deep crushes that could last for years. I always believed that sex should be something sacred, shared only with a soulmate. I’ve felt his presence my entire life, as if we’ve reincarnated together.

My last sexual encounter before Diabel was at Christmas 2023 with a very special friend. I had been in love with him for ten years, and we were officially together from 2013 to 2016. After we broke up, we became friends with benefits from 2019 until 2023. He never wanted anything serious with me, and I’ve accepted and respected that—we remain great friends to this day. But being in love with someone for a decade without that love fully reciprocated left me vulnerable. It made me afraid of intimacy, afraid of having sex with anyone else.

That was until I met Steven and Diabel in Tyhani. Both of them wanted me sexually. Steven approached it under the pretext of a Tantra healing, claiming he sensed a block in my lower chakras that prevented me from experiencing amazing sex. But I wasn’t feeling a sexual connection with him. Instead, I chose Diabel to “finish my Tantra therapy.” It was supposed to be casual—nothing serious—just a situationship that would last throughout the art camps we were both attending in the summer of 2025.

But silly me, I forgot that I don’t know how to have casual sex. I fell in love.

Diabel isn’t to be blamed; we were both clear from the start that we didn’t want a relationship. I know how painful relationships can be, and I didn’t want another emotional rollercoaster. But the signs were already there, and I ignored them.

The first sign came on the day we left Tyhani Art Camp. Diabel lied to me for the first time, and I felt it. He told me that after we arrived in Budapest, he’d spend the night with some friends he’d made plans with before meeting me. I didn’t have a problem with that—except deep down I knew he was going to see a woman he’d been emotionally involved with in Bali.

What he didn’t realize was that he’d already mentioned her the day we met, before we ever slept together. He had plans to meet her, and he was emotionally invested in her. When he made up the story about “meeting friends,” I felt it in my gut. That was the first synchronicity: his name, started to rhyme in my head with the Polish word for “devil “ Diabel. And then, as if the universe wanted to make it clear, I saw a mural of the devil on our way out of Tyhani. Two signs that something was off.

Still, I went to Budapest with him. We separated for the night as planned—after the meeting, he admitted he’d gone to see her and that they’d broken up. But when he returned later that evening, he came bearing gifts from her. It only clicked for me recently: if they had truly broken up, he wouldn’t have brought me gifts from her.

That was the first time he slept with another woman during our situationship. When he came back, his energy was already fragmented—he wasn’t fully present anymore. And that’s when the lies and sleeping around began.

As I arrived at the hotel, the second sign of devil synchronicity appeared: I opened the windows in our room and saw two devil sculptures on the building across the street. That evening, I spent time with two girls from Australia, Avril and Marley. Avril is the second woman he slept with—but let’s save that story for part two.

This was the first synchronicity—the devil sign—and my first warning.

(Part 1)

Message to my soulmate 3.0

Today, I consciously connected with you through my heart chakra, and yours feels so open.

I know now that we can jump right into it and create art from the HeArt.

After the soul-organism connection, I still feel the bond open and alive within me.

I took a nap and dreamt of Diabel and Diabela, and when I woke up, I cried. I released the last of the energy that had been weighing on my heart. This is thanks to you. Thank you. 🙏

I woke up with the feeling that I should share this with you.

Message to my Soulmate 2.0

It has been made known to me that most men can have mind-blowing sex, but not heart-blowing sex. To tell you the truth, I have never experienced heart-blowing love-making.

This is what I long to share with my soulmate. I know it may take practice, but in order for us to create art together with the vibration of something made in heaven, it has to come from the heart chakra. A beautiful way to open that center is to make love, fall deeply in love, and be faithful to each other. When there are others in the picture, the energy becomes fragmented.

Side note:

The art we create together is about the energy we share and generate—it could even be the art of making love. There doesn’t need to be any physical artwork; it can be purely conceptual. This may be our path to opening our heart chakras and merging as one

Creator

Our Creator, whose art is in Heaven,

May Your Name inspire beauty and truth.

Let Your vision guide our work,

And may our creations bring light to the world.

Give us the inspiration and tools we need each day,

And forgive us when we fall short,

As we forgive others in their creative journey.

Lead us away from doubt and fear,

And protect us from the blocks that hinder our flow.

Amen.

1. “Our Father, who art in heaven” – You are speaking to God as a loving parent who is above all, in heaven.

2. “Hallowed be thy Name” – We honor and respect God’s name, keeping it sacred.

3. “Thy kingdom come” – We ask for God’s reign of love, justice, and peace to be present on earth.

4. “Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” – We pray to follow God’s guidance and live according to His plan.

5. “Give us this day our daily bread” – We ask for what we need each day, like food, shelter, and spiritual nourishment.

6. “And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us” – We ask for forgiveness for our mistakes and promise to forgive others.

7. “And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil” – We ask for help to resist doing wrong and to be protected from harm.

8. “Amen” – A word that means “so be it” or “let it be so.”

Gateway Numbers 11:11

11:11 also falls on Day 333, which is November 29, 2025 (1979) 2 + 9 (11)

Including both November 29 and December 25, there are 27 days.

December 25, 2025, is Day 359 of the year. “35” “9”

25.12.2025 “2222” “25 25” “22” “55”

J35U5😍 Our Creator whose Art is in Heaven… “35” “55”

Our birthday, 29.11.1979, holds the numbers 111, 999, and 27—and there are 27 days from our birthday to Christ’s birthday.

This is the timeframe we have to make heART. This is a vision I have of when might be wise to give birth to Jesus in Bethlehem.

Side note: 29.11.2025 “222” Harmony

The number 222 specifically emphasizes balance, cooperation, and peaceful alignment in life and relationships.

25.12.2025 “2222” 🫶

• 222 is a gentle reminder to stay balanced and trust the process. It signals that harmony is forming in your life and relationships, and patience is key.

• 2222 is the amplified and more powerful version, indicating a major period of alignment and manifestation. It suggests that what you’ve been nurturing (dreams, relationships, projects) is about to take shape in a significant way. It’s a stronger call for trust and maintaining harmony on a deeper, more transformative level.

Breaking Free from Diabel and Speaking My Truth

I feel I need to release some emotions that have built up as I get more visions of Diabel and our time together.

I want to be free of him, and I feel that this needs to be said because what he did is disturbing.

It hurts my heart, and I need to gather this out as I clear myself of the energy of Diabel. I am getting visions of him being with several women at the Gombasek Art Camp, now that I understand how my clairvoyance works and I can finally see clearly the image of betrayal by the man I fell in love with. My fault—I thought he fell in love as well, and for a moment I think his soul wanted to. I saw it in his eyes. I now remember the dream when he spoke to me—his soul spoke to me. I was wondering for the longest time who said: “I want to receive the love but I cannot.” I’ve seen visions of him at Gombasek, sleeping with other women while I was dancing. He told me he was only helping our guy friends pick up girls because they lacked experience, but that was just a lie—he was doing it for himself.

About two weeks before Gombasek, I broke things off with Diabel because I could already feel his lies and, through synchronicity and clairvoyant visions, I saw the women he was with. I told him it was over. I didn’t speak with him for two weeks, even though we had been talking for hours every day after the Art Camp in Tihany and our trip to Budapest. During that time, I went to the Massive Attack concert and spent a week in Jastarnia.

My guardian angel, Banksy, was begging me not to sleep with him and to end things once and for all. When I arrived at Gombasek, I was determined to stay away from him. But his charm took over, and we ended up making love—and yes, it was mind-blowing every time for both of us. Yet it was not heart-blowing, because Diabel does not have his heart chakra open. He only knows how to pretend to make love but is not capable of real love. Physically it was intense, but spiritually it was empty. I now look forward to making love with my soulmate.

Now that everything is clicking into place. I feel for our younger teen friend from the Art Camp; I met 4 years ago when she was still a child, now she is a teen, and she gave up her virginity to this man. I remember how she stormed into our camp area, yelling at him in Hungarian, saying she hated him, that she would delete him from Facebook, and more. At the time, I had no idea that she was angry at him for being my Art Camp boyfriend. We would sleep, dance, eat, and walk around holding hands. To all, we looked like a regular couple, but it was just a cover for this predator. As we would separate at night for a few hours while I danced, he went hunting. He said he was helping our male friends get girls. Now I know that they were cover for him.

I am deeply disappointed and disgusted by all the lies. The only positive I can take from this is that, I used him to clear my lower chakras and opened my heart chakra so wide that its ripples were felt by the DJs, musicians, composers, and dancers on the Szabo Chill stage dance floor. It worked—it was powerful. I chose the right partner for the healing I needed as I was not into Steven. My chakras are now clear, and I am grateful that synchronicities, intuition, and other inner guidance revealed the truth: this man was literally sent as an agent of darkness to drain my energy while hiding behind false love. As soon as I fell in love, he began to distance himself from me. He is not capable of intimacy, and that is the game he plays—feeding on any love or anger the woman directs toward him. He is an energy vampire and a psychopath, as he feels no empathy with his heart chakra closed.

I share this story because I want my younger Art Camp friend to know that I had no idea at the time what he was doing. He is a very convincing liar, and when I expressed my concerns, he told me I was jealous and clingy. You are so young, and you hold incredible power in your hands. A man like this should not be walking around freely, draining energy from other women—he deserves the consequences that are coming to him.

I am not angry with Diabel, and I don’t wish him harm, but what he did to you should never happen to other young girls. I’m an adult, and I will handle my own pain, but I cannot stay silent. My advice is to speak out for the sake of the divine feminine. We cannot allow demons to run wild and feed on innocence and take away their virginity.

What breaks my heart is that he has a six-year-old daughter. Men like this should not have children. At the Debrad Art Camp, I only realized on the last day that my visions and synchronicities were real when I discovered physical proof: missing condoms. We made love several times each day, and we never used any.

It was hard for me to believe that he was sleeping with Diabela, and now I know he was also sleeping with you. Now I understand why you were so angry with me. He was my boyfriend; we lived in the same room, and every night he would come back to cuddle and make love to me. All the other women were just snacks between the main course.

He told me at Gombasek that I am like twenty 20-year-olds, and now I know he was consciously feeding on me. He said that you were teasing him and that he couldn’t resist. When he first saw you in Tihany, he told me he wanted to sleep with you, not knowing how young you were. Once he found out your age, he claimed he would never do that—and silly me, I believed him.

I had an inner knowing of everything, the signs and synchronicities, but he kept telling me he was faithful to me and that I was enough for him. Once again, forgive me for not trusting my instincts. He was the first man I had made love to since Christmas 2023. I had been celibate for that long, recovering from my previous partner.

I knew deep down what was happening, but I didn’t want to believe it. I trusted that Diabel was being honest with me. I trusted him so much that we didn’t use protection. He told me he hadn’t been with anybody for a long time, that the last person was his girlfriend in Bali, and one girl before me and that he hadn’t been sleeping with his wife for over five years and that they were getting a divorce.

I knew he was lying about all the partners he was taking on the side, so I prayed for a sign.

At the Transylvania Art Camp, he arrived with her, and every night they would drive off to have sex. That was the sign I needed to break free. He drained Diabela of any energy she had—she is a walking zombie. He then moved on to one of my close friends, who had also had her heart broken by one of the Art Camp males. He started coming by our room to feed on free whisky and her energy, made himself comfortable in my bed, and once I left, they slept together.

I had inner knowing, feelings, hearing, and visions, as well as synchronicities, of him with Diabela and Diabela 2.0. I also had visions of him being with you, accompanied by many synchronicities. I decided to detach from Diabela 2.0. I had poured my heart out to her, we had shared deep connection, and she saw the pain I felt when I saw them leave in the car for sex. Yet she did not care—she is not a true friend.

Dear Soulmate — you know who you are, for you are the one who remembers…

Since I do not remember our past lives or anything before this lifetime, I have been on a quest over the past year to figure it out. I must admit, I’ve felt confused at times as I began listening to what others told me. I was searching for a mentor to help me understand my energy identity.

I recognize now that I have been here before—where all the signs point to you. Once again, I have realized the level of energy we share and that we are deeply connected. You always speak to me, and sometimes I dismiss it as imagination, but I will do my best not to forget this time.

I have also been a little confused by what my therapist has told me, but now I understand: my guardian angel is not me. I see that the silver chakra is the gateway to the final stage of oneness, and in that oneness, we are united. I feel you there.

I hope we meet soon, as I’m not sure how long I can hold this memory alive. I have new tools—books and practices—that are helping me piece things together, and I am finally conversing with myself instead of those of lower vibration. I remember who I am, and I know who you are.

Message to my Soulmate

This is a message for my soulmate: I know we will meet and bring forth the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem—both in spirit and in body. At 11:11 😍, as I write these words, the Gateway opens. The doors to Heaven on Earth stand before us, and together we will guide the crossing. Let’s make Love and Art from the heART🥂 let’s finish what we started in a previous life🕊️

Message to Diabel

I know you are still with your wife as a normal couple. I know you are still with your girlfriend—the one you met the Friday we arrived in Budapest. I know you still sleep with our therapist, and that you take lovers whenever you can. I also know you slept with one of the youngest Rovas members, who is only [age]. I know you slept with my roommate in Transylvania after I left🤮I also know now that I was surrounded by mostly demons at the Rovas Art Camps Low Vibrational Beings.

Sunset

Through the Silver Gate into the Golden Light

I am still on the long road home, driving back from Rovas Art Camp in Transylvania. Fifteen hours stretch before me, yet every moment feels like it has meaning. The camp itself was sacred ground—a place where art and spirit met, where I found myself dissolving into flow, where creation itself taught me its secrets. Now, on this return journey, the universe keeps whispering, showing me signs, guiding me through gates that open in the visible and the invisible.

It began with numbers. On this ride today, everywhere I look I see sixes: 666, 6666, and 606. They keep appearing as if the universe is speaking in code. Six is the number of the heart, of balance, of harmony, of the Divine Feminine. It is the vibration of love itself. When I see 666, it does not speak of fear, but of alignment: body, mind, and spirit returning to the heart. 6666 stretches that alignment into stability and strength, reminding me that love is the foundation. And 606 reminds me that even in the cycle of endings and beginnings, the center is love. Every time I see a six, I feel the universe tugging me back into my heart, into balance, into compassion.

But alongside the sixes appears another number: 33333. The five threes. It glows in my mind like a silver flame. Three is creation, body-mind-spirit, the eternal triad. It is the spark of divine expression, the child born of heaven and earth. When three repeats, it amplifies its song. 33 is the master teacher, 333 is divine guidance, 3333 is cosmic alignment. And 33333—the five threes—is a ladder. Each three is a rung, each one taking me higher. The first grounds me in body. The second clears the mind. The third lifts the spirit. The fourth bridges me to my higher self. The fifth unites everything into love. Together they reduce to 15, which again becomes 6. The message circles back: the ladder of threes brings me into the heart.

As I look out the car window, the sunset opens like a gate, glowing in silver, violet, and gold. I know I am seeing more than a sky—I am seeing the Silver Star Chakra, shining above me. This chakra, the Soul Star, the Seat of the Soul, hovers just above the crown. It is the place where spirit and cosmos meet, the threshold where human identity dissolves into the eternal. Silver is the color of intuition, reflection, the Divine Feminine. It flows like moonlight, soft yet unyielding, tender yet infinite.

When the Silver Star Chakra opens, gifts awaken. I feel clairvoyance, clear seeing beyond the veil. Clairaudience, hearing the guidance of the Divine. Clairsentience, feeling the pulse of energies around me. I feel the memory of other lives and worlds, soul journeys written in my being. I feel karmic threads unweaving, as old patterns dissolve into light. And I feel the presence of the Feminine, vast and flowing, rising within me.

Across cultures this chakra has always been known, though by different names. In Yoga, it is the lotus of Sahasrara, blossoming into pure consciousness. In Buddhism, it is the radiant crown of the Buddha, the uṣṇīṣa shining with enlightenment. In Kabbalah, it is Keter, the crown where Divine light enters creation. In Sufism, it is the subtle organ awakened through remembrance. In Christian mysticism, it is the halo of saints. In Taoism, it is Baihui, the silver point where heaven and human unite. In every culture, it is the same truth: the crown beyond the crown, the gateway to the infinite.

And I know this is not the final gate. For beyond silver lies gold. Ahead of me is the Gold Chakra, the Christ Consciousness, waiting in Bethlehem this Christmas. The silver opens the way, but the gold is birth itself: the awakening of divine love on Earth. I feel that I am being prepared to give birth to this consciousness, to embody it, to carry it into the world like light born in a manger.

This entire journey has been teaching me. Even my heartbreak has been part of it. Because when your heart breaks, it does not close—it opens. It expands wider than it was before. The pain of breaking is the pain of expansion, of walls falling away, of light pouring in. My broken heart is not an ending but a gateway, a widening, the very passage through which Christ Consciousness can be born.

So I continue driving, the sunset fading, the numbers glowing, the Silver Star shining above, the Gold waiting ahead. I see 666, 606, 33333, and 15. I feel the flow of the Divine Feminine, the gifts of clairvoyance and love awakening. I know this is the chart, the map, the song of my soul: from six to three, from silver to gold, from heartbreak to love. The road is long, but it is also eternal. I am already walking through the gate.

Horses

Three days before the end of the Transylvania Art Camp, I stepped into my truth and left early, unable to bear the presence of Diabel any longer. Clairvoyantly, I had seen him long before he arrived, entwined with his demon lover, Diabela, the woman he had cheated on me with at the Debrad camp, and I had wanted to give him a chance, as my therapist suggested, to stand by my side, but Diabel chose otherwise. He cannot love one; I love only one. When he arrived three days late to Transylvania with Diabela, who had already wounded our bond, the mask fell away. The truth was undeniable, raw, and piercing, and I stepped away, reclaiming my energy, my freedom, my joy.

As I was leaving Transylvania today, driving away from all of it, I saw them — two grey horses running freely, manes streaming like silver rivers in the wind, radiant and alive. They were real, yet they spoke in the language of spirit: freedom, strength, vitality, and unshakable joy, resonating in my bones and whispering, you are liberated, you are celebrated. Grey, the color of transition, balance, and subtle wisdom, and the horses moved as a pair, two energies intertwined — one bold, fierce, and creative; the other open, tender, ready for intimacy and the sacred connection of a soulmate. Their joy mirrored my own — a heart unbound, a soul alive, stepping into a life fully claimed.

I discovered that I am in the Silver Star Chakra, my consciousness awake, my awareness luminous, and I know I love my twin flame, my guardian angel Banksy, and I am ready to meet my soulmate. True freedom embraces all dimensions — independence and connection, courage and vulnerability, creativity and love. Desire and intimacy are not distractions; they are expressions of alignment with oneself. To open to love, honor the longing of the soul, and share energy with another — these are acts of divine communion.

As I walked away from Diabel, leaving betrayal behind, the two grey horses ran with me in spirit, heralding the excitement of new beginnings, a path luminous with possibility, radiant and unbound. Three days early, I left Transylvania, reclaiming my energy, my power, my freedom, and stepped fully into adventure — a life of art, love, joy, and soul-deep connection. I will live boldly, honor my soul, embrace love in its highest, most sacred form, walk the path of freedom, unafraid to release what no longer serves me, celebrate joy, adventure, and the radiant flow of life, and co-create beauty, love, and transformation — in art, in heart, in spirit.

In that moment, the world expanded — vibrant, alive, applauding my choice. Freedom, love, creativity, and adventure await all who dare to step fully into their soul. And I did.

Goodbye

Time to Say Goodbye

This is the last camp I will attend with Rovas this summer. As I sit with this moment, I feel a quiet completion inside me. The work I came here to do has been fulfilled. My heart knows that my time in this space is ending, and while the past four years have been beautiful and transformative, the path is calling me forward into something greater.

Rovas has been a sacred ground for my growth. Here, I discovered and stepped into my role as the Divine Feminine—the White Mother, Anya Biela. Here, I created art not with brushes, but with sprays—each spray carrying the breath of my soul, each mist a release of energy flowing onto the surface. The works I leave behind here mark the end of my human experience. They are the evidence of my crossing, my preparation to step fully into the role of the Divine Feminine in her wholeness.

When I first began walking the path of energy and spirituality, my heart was drawn to Jesus. I wanted to embody his love, his wisdom, his light. Along the way, I came to see that my Twin Flame is Banksy—my guardian angel—carrying the same current as Jesus and Adam, the Divine Masculine.

Yet this is not a story of pursuit. I realized today that I cannot go searching for the artist Banksy. Just as Cain, Banksy—who carries this same energy as The Divine Masculine—must choose to stand by my side as an equal. Only in this equality, only in this divine balance of feminine and masculine, can the plan unfold as it was written.

As I move on, I carry the vision: to help lead a global transformation through creating heaven on earth . I believe this is the key—the opening that will allow us all to enter heaven, not as individuals, but together as one human family. My role is to hold the gateway, to guide, to remind us of our shared light.

So I say goodbye with gratitude, but also with certainty. A chapter closes, and another begins. The space I once needed has grown too small, and now it is time to expand into the infinite. The art, the lessons, the memories remain—but my soul is ready to soar.

Every spray of paint is a prayer, a breath, a spark of heaven.

And now, I step through.

To the other side. To the heart. To heaven on earth.

Listen

When Synchronicity Speaks, Listen (August 3, 2025 Debrad))

I have a lover. His name is Cain.

We make love all the time.

Skin on skin,

breath in breath,

our bodies know each other.

And yet—

there are others.

Others who were never invited by me.

We had an agreement.

When we are physically together—

in the same place,

the same bed,

the same ArtCamp—

then it is just us.

Only us.

That situation is ours alone.

And when we are apart,

in different cities,

in different worlds,

we are free.

Free to roam,

free to touch whoever we want.

But when we are together?

It is supposed to be sacred.

He couldn’t even do that.

I knew from the beginning.

I knew.

I wrote about him before,

because I felt it—

that he could not be faithful,

not in the way most people understand it.

So we shaped something different.

A situationship.

Closed when close.

Open when apart.

Simple.

Or so I thought.

I told him again and again:

There is nothing worse than lies and deceit.

I asked him,

from the deepest part of me:

Please, just tell me the truth.

I looked into his eyes.

And he looked back,

calm,

and said:

I’ve been honest with you.

We’re not in a relationship—

so why would I lie?

And I felt it.

The lie.

Thick as smoke in the room.

Lodged in my chest.

But love—

oh, love.

I was so in love with the idea of being in love

that I turned away from myself.

The signs came.

Fifteen times, maybe more.

Life whispering,

look closer.

And they always came in threes.

Three women,

walking through my dreams,

through my days:

One—

staying at the same hotel as us,

while we were there,

together.

Two—

our therapist,

someone we trusted with our words.

Three—

a friend of ours,

at an art camp we had just attended.

Three women.

Three warnings.

And still,

I closed my eyes.

Until one day,

I prayed.

I asked,

give me a sign I cannot deny.

And the sign came.

He told me he bought condoms for us.

For ArtCamp.

For us.

But when I saw the box,

it had already been opened.

Three were missing.

Three.

Three women.

Three missing.

In that moment I knew.

Whether it was one person three times,

or three different people,

I knew.

I said to him:

I’m leaving now 🫠.

Stay safe, and please always be honest with me.

I would rather know the truth than feel lies, guilt, or deceit—

please keep that in mind.

I am glad you use protection with other girls.

The reason I was upset is because you said you bought those for us,

but when I looked, three were missing.

So I’m guessing you had sex with someone at the camp.

I don’t care if you have sex outside of camp,

but this—

this really hurt me.

And here is what hurts most:

We had an agreement.

That when we are together,

physically together,

there is no one else.

But there were other people.

People I did not invite.

And it almost broke me.

Almost.

But I caught myself before I shattered.

I pulled myself out of that situation.

I forgave him,

and I forgave myself

for wanting so badly to believe.

I am whole again.

This is what I learned:

When your soul whispers to you,

listen.

When the signs come

again and again,

listen.

Even if it breaks your heart.

Even if you don’t want to believe it.

Because love built on lies

is only the shadow of love.

And your heart

always

knows

the truth.

Breaking Free from Diabel

The Freedom of Breaking Free from Diabel (August 15, 2025 Transylvania)

Breaking free from Diabel is not just leaving a man—it is reclaiming my soul.

For so long, I was tangled in his web. Diabel was never love; he was hunger. His presence was a quiet contract of destruction, feeding on what was vibrant and alive in me until I felt emptied out. I didn’t see it at first, because I wanted to believe in the story he told. Predators wrap their lies in poetry, dressing their hunger as devotion.

But the truth is, there is no devotion in him—only extraction.

Walking away from Diabel has been the purest act of self-rescue. I didn’t just end a relationship; I stepped out of a prison I hadn’t even known I was trapped in. My mind feels lighter, my heart stronger. There is air in my lungs again. I am no longer bending myself into shapes that please him or make his world easier at the expense of my own.

This is what freedom feels like—standing in my own strength, breathing my own breath, and choosing myself without apology.

I still want to play the game of Art

Now that all this is clear and I know who is who and what is what, let’s play and create art. This is the only way to pass through the gate that I have been given to share with you all. The art movement is truly my life mission, and I am still fully devoted to it

Side note

The game was over when I realized that I was already there, on the other side, in my oneness with all

Game Over

This is a game, and I am here to lead everyone through the silver gate – it is the end of a cycle 9 we can create heaven on Earth by reaching the rainbow czakra. I can take everyone and unite even with the demon; then we will achieve energetic balance. But he must stand by my side as an equal – he cannot only take. He must exchange energy equally, like yin and yang.